Psalm 109:21-24 “But you, O Sovereign Lord, deal well with me for your name’s sake. Out of the goodness of your love, deliver me. For I am poor and needy and my heart is wounded within me. I fade away like an evening shadow. I am shaken off like a locust. My knees give way from fasting. My body is thin and gaunt.” NIV
There is a true story of a man who had quite a life. He was born in a small town. He was the youngest of eight boys. He was treated as insignificant by his family, almost like he was invisible. His brothers belittled him and dismissed him. That could really wound a person. Even his father seemed to overlook him. That could absolutely wound a person. He got a great job when he became a young adult, but his boss was completely crazy, was out to get him, and even tried to kill him more than once. He literally had to go into a witness protection kind of program on more than one occasion. Think of the woundedness that could result from fearing for your life every day. He dealt with significant enemies all his life. He had one close friend, and he died. Oh, how he grieved. It was yet another wound. In fact, he lived to see everyone he loved die.
He, himself, had a physical problem that caused him pain in his bones. What a heavy heart physical pain can produce. Though no one would have predicted he’d ever be one to cheat on his wife, he had an affair and then murdered his mistress’s husband. The baby that was born to him as a result of the affair, died shortly thereafter. Even with all of those heartaches and wounds, he was a man of faith, a man who wanted to please God, a man after God’s own heart. His name? David. His story is chronicled in the Old Testament.
I have no legitimate proof for the hypotheses that I want to present, yet what I have to say comes directly from God’s Word. Those who don’t allow God to tend to their wounds, wind up wounding themselves and others. I believe David had some wounds that others inflicted. I believe he also had some wounds that were self-inflicted. I think it is possible that he ignored treatment for those wounds, and out of a wounded place he then became one that wounded others.
The medical world has identified three kinds of wounds. Scrapes and abrasions, lacerations, and puncture wounds. Some take longer than others to heal. Some involve more bleeding than others. Some leave a scar that’s visible. Others may leave no visible trace of the wound behind, but they are still there.
There are different kinds of wounds we experience in life. Maybe we were minimized or overlooked in our childhood like David was. God told the Prophet, Samuel, to go to Jesse’s house in Bethlehem and to meet Jesse’s sons. One of them was to be anointed the King of Israel. Scripture says that Jesse called his sons one by one to meet Samuel. All seven older brothers passed by Samuel, but Samuel never got the green light from God to anoint any of them King. Samuel said to Jesse, “Are these all of the sons you have?” David’s dad, hadn’t even thought to call David in from the field. He never considered that the shepherd boy, the youngest could be king. It’s almost a Cinderella story, isn’t it? Jesse called David in from tending the sheep at Samuel’s request to see if his foot would fit the “glass slipper,” and he would be anointed King. It did. But can’t you just imagine a little wound was birthed in David’s heart from being overlooked?
Some of us know what it’s like to be picked last for gym class, to be rejected in a certain relationship or to feel passed over for a promotion. Like when we speak, no one is really listening. It hurts.
Then what about his crazy boss, King Saul? He was always jealous of David. He knew David was gaining a following. Every time David turned around Saul was throwing a spear at him, trying to kill him. He had to hide in caves, in fear of his life. Saul said nasty things about him.
Some of us know what it’s like to feel like someone is out to get us or to make us look bad. Our reputations can suffer. They might like to expose our weaknesses or speak in a sarcastic way that causes us embarrassment. We can literally live in fear like we’re walking on eggshells wherever we go. It hurts.
Then there was the major loss David suffered when his best friend, Jonathan, died in battle. II Samuel describes in chapter one how he grieved, and cried, and lamented this deep loss. Jonathan, King Saul’s son, had been on David’s side. He had David’s back. Many of us know what it is like to lose someone we love. It can leave a wound for a lifetime in the deep places of our hearts.
Doctors agree that all three kinds of wounds, the scrapes and abrasions, lacerations and puncture wounds require water under pressure in order to clean them. In order for the wound to heal, there has to be a cleansing of the wound. If not, infection sets in. Complication sets in. Keeping a wound clean is the best way to avoid additional problems.
I want to suggest to you that perhaps David wasn’t good with wound care. Maybe he didn’t treat each wound along the way, exposing the wound to the cleansing and healing that God can offer every time we are in distress. Maybe after a lifetime of feeling neglected, being talked about and losing his good friend, infection had set into his heart and mind. Instead of dealing with his wounds one at a time, he let them pile up and as a result, a kind of spiritual infection went to his heart. The infection defiled his heart. Emotional injury and anger turned to greed, idolatry and deception, and when he found himself in a position of authority as King of Israel, he somehow developed the faulty thinking that he was above the rules, that he deserved to have whatever he wanted and do whatever he wanted and that he was exempt from the consequences.
And so, he had an affair with Bathsheba. She became pregnant, and he had her husband killed to try to cover things up. You can’t cover up sin. Sin always leaves a stain that can’t be covered. It has to be cleansed.
I hear of people wounding others like David did when he killed Uriah, Bathsheba’s husband. When I hear their story, their personal journey, it often is a story of woundedness where one wound led to another and finally, they couldn’t take the hurt or pain or rejection or whatever it was they were dealing with and they looked for a way out, any way out, whether it was legal or illegal, moral or immoral. And as I listen to them, I can understand why they did what they did, but it seems, looking back, there was always a better way. Had they not let things fester, had they dealt with life’s wounds one at a time, had they confessed what was going on instead of pretending things were fine, the end result could have been different, and they wouldn’t have had to deal with remorse and regret and the wish for the rest of their life that they turn back time.
As I read Scripture, I see potential for this kind of progression in David’s life. Following the murder of Uriah, God sent Nathan to confront David about his sin. Nathan told David that as a result of what he had done, the son that Bathsheba was carrying would die. The baby was born and sometime within the first year or two, he was struck ill, and David immediately started begging God to change his mind. It’s in II Sam. 12. He fasted while lying on the floor of his home for days. He completely retreated from everything and everyone. His servants tried to talk to him, but he wouldn’t listen. Seven days after the baby became sick, he died. Those who were involved were afraid to tell David the baby had passed because they thought he might commit suicide.
One scholar believes it was during the illness of David’s baby, while he was lamenting and lying on the floor that he wrote Psalm 51. Hear these words from Psalm 51:1-12
Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. 2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! 3 For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. 4 Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you may be justified in your words and blameless in your judgment. 5 Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me. 6 Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being, and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.7 Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. 8 Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice.
9 Hide your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities. 10 Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. 11 Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. 12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.
- Pretending we’re okay when we are really wounded, is a form of hypocrisy that can lead to a terrible infection.David came to a point where he realized he couldn’t live a lie. God wanted him to walk in truth. He had thought he could murder Uriah, take Bathsheba to be his wife quickly, and cover up the whole adultery thing.
I think many have bought Satan’s lie that says you have to fake a smile at all times to look like a Christian! I am concerned that people who want to be real with their problems don’t think the church is a place for them to do so. Listen, it may not be this way everywhere, but this is a place where we weep with those who weep! Sometimes, the most spiritual thing you can do is cry!
There is a place for lament and the expression of grief and pain in the life of a Christian. Tears are not a disappointment or embarrassment to God. We serve a God who is big enough to handle our truth, truth laced with pain. Some of us have been hurt by our families. Some of us have been hurt by our friends. Some of us have been hurt by people we’ve trusted. Some of us are sitting in the middle of a mess of our own making, but the bottom line is, we’ve been wounded, and if those wounds haven’t been addressed, we’re still wounded.
Often, we walk into church wounded and walk out wounded because being real, sharing our hurts, we think, leads to scrutiny and judgment or that it’s somehow a sign of weakness. Listen with your hearts this morning. Let’s let this retreat be a safe place. Where did we get the idea that becoming Christians means we are supposed to become immune to hurt? We’re still living in an imperfect world. We’re still confined to the human experience. That means we’re still susceptible to being wounded.
The first step to getting your wound cared for is telling the truth. What good would it do to have a pain in your side and go to the doctor only to say it’s your head that hurts? You wouldn’t receive the right treatment. What good does it do to go to a house of healing and say you don’t have need of healing if you really do? Let’s officially declare the days of “I’m fine, how are you?” over. If it’s not true, tell the truth. It’s okay to say, “I’m struggling today, would you pray for me.” “I’m hurting right now. Can we have lunch? I need someone to talk to.”
David understood God wanted him to walk in truth. What truth do you need to tell today? Do you need to convince yourself that it’s okay to get wound care? Do you need to confess some sin and tell the truth to God? He already knows what the truth is anyway. Do you need to tell the truth about something to someone else? Pretending you’re not wounded won’t work. It will only create an infection and a bigger problem.
- Prolonging wound care will rob us of our joy and zap our strength.
David said, “Restore to me the joy of your salvation.” Do you remember how passionate David was when he killed Goliath? He was all about advancing God’s name. I Samuel talks about the way God was with David because David was with God. Whatever God wanted David to do, he was willing to do it. But I believe that at some point, woundedness got in the way of David’s passion. The joy of his salvation and the joy of serving the Lord were somehow in David’s rear view mirror. They became a part of his past.
Woundedness can literally take us out of the game and keep us from serving God which is a joyfully addictive experience. When woundedness sidelines us, we isolate ourselves. We miss out on relationships. We look for excuses to stay home from special occasions or church or whatever because we think if we don’t have to see anyone, no one will notice that we are wounded, and we won’t have to deal with it.
Woundedness will keep us stuck in a place of despair and depression and discouragement. God wants us in the game of abundant life. If we don’t seek wound care, we’ll become drained by the infection of the wound and be zapped of energy and joy.
Jesus came to save us from our sins and give us eternal life in Heaven, but that’s only part of the story. That’s only part of the Gospel. People who are walking around wounded don’t want to hear that if they just hang on until they die, they’ll one day have a wonderful experience in Heaven with God. People don’t need hope for someday or one day or eternity when they’re wounded as much as they need immediate relief. I’m telling you that Jesus came not only to save us for Heaven, but he came to give us abundant life right now.
Psalm 147:3 “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” What good does it do to come to church where healing can take place only to leave at the end of the service just as wounded and lonely as we were when we came in? Prolonging wound care would be like putting off treatment that we need for our physical body. It wouldn’t make any sense to go to the doctor for your weekly appointment for some kind of treatment only to refuse the treatment. What’s even more insane would be to go back to the doctor every week where healing was available and refuse it week after week after week. Yet, when we won’t admit our woundedness, when we prolong wound care, we’re doing the same thing when we come to church. Why put off healing? Why not let Jesus do his job description?
- Sometimes the greatest worship we can offer comes from our greatest wounds. When David heard the news that his son had died, he washed his face, changed his clothes and went to worship God. Strange, but it is interesting for us as Christians to consider what David’s behavior might say to us.
Nearing the end of Psalm 51, it’s as if David has a light bulb moment. He has an “aha” moment. “It’s not the blood of bulls and goats that you want, O God,” David says. It’s not the animal sacrifices that you want, Rather, Psalm 51:17 says, 17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.
David understood in that moment what God wanted. God wanted David’s wounds. God wanted David’s hurts. God wanted David’s broken heart so that He could remake it. So that He could cleanse it. So that He could do wound care for David’s heartache as well as for his sin. When you take your broken spirit and your broken heart to someone, to offer it to them, it’s because you believe they can mend it, fix it, restore it or remake it.
When children go to their parents with a wound it’s because they believe their parents know how to make it better. They show honor, respect and confidence in that moment, in submitting to the treatment of the wound from one who knows how to care for it.
To bring your wound to God, to trust Him with the deepest pain of your life, why that may be your greatest worship, your greatest sacrifice. In doing so, you are giving Him complete control to cleanse you and start a new work in your life. That’s true worship.
Everybody goes through wounding experiences in life. Whether the wounds are physical, spiritual, emotional, or relational, they’re either in your life now or they’re coming. So, what do we do when we’re wounded?
Be honest with God. Tell Him exactly how you feel. You need to unload all of your feelings. When you share your feelings with God, when you trust him with your pain, you’re worshiping – even when those feelings are negative.
God did not make our bodies to handle negative emotions. God never designed them that way. When we swallow our emotions, our stomach keeps score. So, the first thing you do when you experience pain in life is confess it. Tell God you don’t like what happened. Don’t worry. God can handle it. Talk to a trusted Christian friend. Let them pray for you and help bear your burdens. Don’t put off getting the help you need by pretending you’re alright.
Our hurts will never just go away. Time does not heal all wounds, but God can. God cares about your broken heart. That’s half of the reason Jesus came, to bind up your broken heart. He healed David’s heart. He’ll heal yours. Jesus, the Suffering, Wounded Servant suffered all the hurts that anyone could suffer.
It didn’t start with the garden arrest. Jesus had already been betrayed by Judas and disappointed by his three friends who couldn’t stay awake during his greatest hour of agony as He prayed to His Father in the garden. Those closest to Him weren’t there for Him. He knows what that pain feels like.
Because Jesus suffered, healing has been provided for you. It’s God’s desire to heal your hurts, but He has to control your heart before He can heal it.
Come to Jesus. Surrender fully, and go from wounded to whole.
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